


of transition and permanence

by loveintheveins



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Childhood Friends, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Graduation, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-30 12:22:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14496888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loveintheveins/pseuds/loveintheveins
Summary: They had become friends in the first week of elementary school when a snotty Oikawa had accidentally bumped against Hajime’s table on his way to the bathroom, causing the green paint jar to fall over the drawing of his family he’d been trying to finish. They’d been inseparable since that day.Sometimes Hajime still couldn’t believe his luck; if somebody had told his younger self that one day he’d be dating his best friend and that their families would be supportive he’d have laughed in their faces. But somehow that’s what ended up happening, and he had mostly Oikawa to thank for it.





	of transition and permanence

**i. 12 years old**

 

 _I really should’ve closed the curtains_. That was Hajime’s first thought after waking up, the obnoxiously bright morning sun shone directly into his face, preventing him from going back to sleep. He was having such a nice dream, too.

Rolling onto his stomach, he buried his face in the pillow and closed his eyes tightly to keep the sunlight at bay. He tried to concentrate on the fragmented images left in his mind, but every time he tried to make them clearer all that he saw were vague shapes and overly bright colours.

If he prodded enough, he could just make out a makeshift stage in a decorated gymnasium, a crowd of faceless people dressed in navy and white with red flowers pinned to their chests, as well as fluffy brown hair, and a smile that showed dimples and made warmth blossom in his chest. However, there was nothing else to help him put those mismatched puzzle pieces together into something that even remotely made sense in his sleepy state. It seemed like the more he tried to hold on to the dream, the quicker it slid through his fingers.

Grumbling to himself, Hajime gave up on the futile task of going back to sleep and threw back the blankets, yawning and blinking the daze out of his eyes. His bedside clock read 05:57 a.m. and he cursed himself again for leaving the curtains open. He was about to get up and start his day when his eyes caught on the futon laid on the ground beside his bed.

One Oikawa Tooru was lying on his back with his arms and legs sprawled out like a starfish, his head resting on a small pile of pillows he had stolen from the couch in the living room. Most of his body was covered by a thick navy comforter dotted with white stars — something he’d brought over to Hajime’s house a few years ago when they’d started having sleepovers like this. His face, however, was visible and it took Hajime all his willpower not to laugh out loud.

Oikawa’s mouth was comically open as he snored lightly, a thin line of drool running down his chin to wet the pillow. His face scrunched up slightly every time he exhaled, and to complete the picture his hair was a complete mess, the strands sticking in every direction and making him look like he’d been wrestling a bear in the woods. Whenever someone called Oikawa cute Hajime felt tempted to show them a picture of how he slept; he had a lot of those for blackmail purposes.

Just as Hajime was thinking about all the great shots he had in a password-protected folder on his phone — safe from a certain nosy brat —, Oikawa snored so loudly that Hajime couldn’t help but let out a startled laugh.

Oikawa immediately reacted to the noise by closing his mouth, scrunching up his face, and scratching at his chin. When he touched the drying drool, he let out a dissatisfied grumble and retracted his hand, bringing it to rub at his eyes. Hajime couldn’t help but chuckle.

“...jime-chan?” Oikawa mumbled around a yawn, his eyes still closed.

“Yeah, Slobberkawa?” he teased, which earned him an indignant huff in response. Oikawa opened his eyes slowly and blinked several times to adjust to the brightness.

“Stop laughing at me, you brute. You’re just awed that you get to watch me sleep!”

“Yeah, I’m awed at how ugly your face looks,” he tried unsuccessfully to hold back his laughter, and that got him a pillow to the face. Personally, Hajime thought it was completely worth it. “C’mon, let’s get up and do something useful for a change,” he said as he headed for the bathroom to take a quick shower.

“Speak for yourself, I’m always very useful!” Oikawa trilled in his most annoying voice, and Hajime heard him skip down the stairs.

The warm water did wonders to wake him up fully, and when he exited the bathroom he felt ready to face the day and the pile of homework he—

Suddenly all the scattered images he’d tried to organise before rearranged into a clear picture, and with such speed that it left him reeling. Huh. Yesterday had been their elementary school graduation ceremony, which meant they were free for the next three or so weeks before entering middle school.

The ceremony had been a bittersweet affair and a lot of tears were shed since their classmates, who’d been together for six years, were now parting ways and scattering to the many middle schools in the neighbourhood. For his part, Oikawa had been ecstatic about the change, spouting nonsense like how _“we’re moving to the next stage of our lives, Hajime-chan!”_ and how it was _“a challenge we get to overcome together, Hajime-chan!”_ Hajime had pushed his face away and told him to stop being so annoying, but had been secretly happy that his friend felt the same way as he did.

They had become friends in the first week of elementary school when a snotty Oikawa had accidentally bumped against Hajime’s table on his way to the bathroom, causing the green paint jar to fall over the drawing of his family he’d been trying to finish. Oikawa had immediately scrambled to apologise, moving his hands around as he spoke.

“Oh no! I-I’m so sorry, I ruined your painting! I didn’t mean to, I swear, I was just—”

Hajime held up a hand to silence him and said, “That’s okay, I know it was an accident.”

That didn’t seem to appease the boy at all, and he’d started to open his mouth again when Hajime pointed at the drawing and smiled.

“It’s okay, now it looks like I drew aliens!”

Oikawa had stared at him with wide eyes for a moment, before his face broke into the biggest smile Hajime had ever seen and saying cheerfully, “Yeah, aliens are so cool!”

They’d been inseparable since that day, to the point where their parents became good friends after inevitably spending so much time together. Now it was a common — even expected — occurrence for Oikawa to stay for dinner and a sleepover on Fridays so they could watch one of his X-Files box sets, or for Hajime to have lunch at the Oikawas’ on Sundays, when Oikawa’s sister and nephew came to visit.

Hajime’s growling stomach snapped him out of his thoughts. Why was he being so weirdly nostalgic about their friendship, anyway? They were _twelve_ , and it wasn’t like they were never going to see each other again. They were going to the same school, and Oikawa lived _one street away_. Honestly, this was just ridiculous.

Deciding he should probably check on Oikawa and assess the damage done to his kitchen, Hajime silently walked down the stairs. When he rounded the corner he saw that Oikawa was already setting up the table with a look of total concentration. He lifted his head when he heard Hajime’s footsteps approaching and smiled, opening his arms and gesturing at the finished product.

Hajime had to admit that the food looked _and_ smelled delicious, which made him feel a weird mixture of proud and hungry — but there was no way in hell he was going to tell Oikawa that, otherwise he’d never hear the end of it. So he did the next best thing: tease him.

“Well, hopefully it’ll be edible and it won’t send us to the hospital.”

The jab didn’t seem to faze Oikawa at all, considering he just smiled broader and said, “You’re just jealous my cooking skills are far better than yours. Anyway, let’s eat! I want to go play volleyball in the park!”

At that moment Hajime’s parents showed up and, upon seeing that the table had already been laid out for breakfast, immediately started complimenting Oikawa for his hard work. He was positively glowing from the praise, and Hajime looked away to hide his grin. Oikawa was such a nerd.

After cleaning up and promising his parents they’d be careful, they took Hajime’s volleyball and walked to the convenience store on Oikawa’s street to buy some water and candy before heading to the park. When they got there, Oikawa wasted no time before running off to stand some feet away from Hajime and throwing the ball in the air a few times to test his grip.

“C’mon, Hajime-chan! Get in position, I want to set for you!” he said with a large smile, his short body barely able to contain all the energy buzzing just beneath his skin.

“Okay, okay, I get it! God, you'll be unstoppable when middle school starts," Hajime shook his head and laughed at his friend’s antics.

“You say that, but you were the one who showed up at my house everyday at 6 a.m. during the summer to set for you!” Oikawa countered.

Hajime couldn't argue with that, so he just got into position and said, “whatever, let's just play”. By Oikawa’s nasty smirk, he knew he'd won the argument.

As they threw the ball back and forth, Hajime remembered how Oikawa had run into his backyard when they were seven, talking at a hundred miles per hour about this sport he’d discovered after watching a match with his father and how _“we have to try it, Hajime-chan! It looks so cool!”_ Soon after Oikawa had been given a volleyball and the boys had liked it so much that they'd started taking classes at the local community centre.

And now here they were, after countless lessons and games with the local team, about to start their volleyball careers for real at Kitagawa Daiichi. Hajime felt that they had grown so much already, and he was very excited about the next three years of their lives, which would no doubt be full of new experiences and opportunities to grow. He had a feeling they would be invincible.

 

 

**ii. 15 years old**

 

 _BREAKING NEWS: Iwaizumi Hajime is in love with his best friend, best setter in the Miyagi prefecture and very-much-not-interested-in-him Oikawa Tooru_.

Well, at least that's what Hajime heard being announced to the whole country on the Saturday morning news when he walked into the living room. Though that might’ve had something to do with the fact he hadn't slept at all last night. He honestly wasn't sure.

Yes, that's right. Hajime was head over heels in love with his dumbass childhood friend, and what better time to figure it out than at your middle school graduation ceremony when said friend was being confessed to by three different girls? Granted, Oikawa hadn't accepted any of the confessions, but even so, it had hardly been the ideal environment in which to have such a life-changing revelation. So why had it happened then?

In a moment of clarity, at approximately 3 a.m., he realised his feelings had likely been under the surface for quite some time and had just required a strong enough trigger to come to light; and what trigger was more powerful than jealousy? If Hajime was being honest with himself, seeing Oikawa smiling amicably at those girls had made him crave his attention and affection and reminded him of how rarely that smile had been directed at him those past few weeks.

Middle school had brought a lot of changes for the both of them, and at first Hajime thought that Oikawa’s sudden reticence was due to them growing up and apart from each other. While his insecurities made him over-analyse every interaction between them to look for signs of cracks in their friendship, the rational part of his mind provided him with solid evidence that Oikawa still went out of his way to seek his company, whether it be on the court, during lunch break, or to make the walk to and from school. On the other hand Hajime had caught Oikawa staring at him pensively many times — almost like he was trying very hard to solve a particularly difficult puzzle —, and he’d undoubtedly been more careful about his casual touches and was acting more shifty around him.

All things considered, there was definitely something Oikawa wasn’t telling him, though it wasn’t as if Hajime could ask now considering he was obviously going to keep this damn crush a secret. There was no way he’d come up to Oikawa and confess to him anyway, when the mere sight of him yesterday at the ceremony had made his heart beat faster and his hands clam up. And if hearing his laughter had butterflies stir up in Hajime’s stomach, that was a knowledge he would take to his grave.

Deciding he should probably inspect his feelings after a cup or three of strong coffee, Hajime dragged his sleep-deprived body down the stairs and towards the kitchen. When he got there his father was already dressed, and he poured the steaming beverage on a mug and held it out towards Hajime with an amused look on his face.

“You look like hell warmed over, Hajime-kun. Couldn’t sleep?”

“Thanks, Otou-san. Yeah, something like that,” he said as he took a sip from the mug, burning his tongue in the process. Whatever, he was too tired to care.

His father made a face at him and chuckled lightly. “Well, maybe you should try and get some sleep now. Okaa-san and I will be going out to visit her aunt at the hospital in Senboku and we’ll only be back tomorrow.”

“Oh, was it something serious?” Hajime asked worriedly; he hadn’t heard anything about this.

“She slipped on some ice and got a bit bruised, but thankfully nothing got broken. The hospital called us earlier to let us know since she’s elderly and lives by herself, so we’re driving there to bring her to stay with us until she recovers.”

At that moment his mother appeared in the door to the kitchen holding two overnight bags and the car keys. She gave him a disapproving look and clicked her tongue, shaking her head slightly.

“You look terrible, Hajime-chan. I keep telling you about the importance of sleep, especially for a teenager such as yourself. You’re such a handsome young man, but if you’re not careful you’ll end up aging before your time. Also, didn’t you want to grow taller like Tooru-kun? You can’t do that if you don’t get enough sleep.”

Hajime couldn’t hold back a startled snort at his mother’s antics. “Oh my god, Okaa-san. I get it, please. I was actually going to sleep now.”

“Not before you eat some proper food, you won’t. And don’t even get me started on how bad coffee is for your body. And I mean that for _both_ of you,” she said while glaring half-heartedly at Hajime’s father. He couldn’t hold his laughter then; his mother nagged him so much, but he knew she did it out of love.

“Fine, fine. Don’t worry, I’ll eat something nutritious and _then_ go to sleep,” he said while trying not to giggle. He could hear his father trying to do the same from behind him and failing miserably.

“Okay, let’s get going them. We’ll be back tomorrow, don’t burn the house down in the meantime,” his father smiled and patted him on the back before taking one of the bags from his mother and walking out of the kitchen towards the entryway.

“Yessir! Drive safely,” Hajime called out.

He listened to the sounds of the engine coming to life and the car leaving the driveway while making some toast. When he’d finished eating, he dragged himself back up the stairs before flopping down onto his bed and falling asleep almost immediately.

When he woke up, the sun was casting long shadows against the walls of his room, painting everything in soft golden hues. He felt disoriented and dazed as he blinked his eyes open against the light, fragments of his dream still clinging to the forefront of his thoughts: the straight line of a nose, the soft curve of a cupid’s bow, cute dimples, and the tinkling sound of a sweet laugh.

When he managed to make sense of them and realised their implications he quickly scrambled to sit up and clear his head of those embarrassing images. How bad was this damn crush that it was even plaguing his dreams? He’d never hear the end of it if he told Oikawa about this. Nope, there was _no way in hell_ he was going to make a fool of himself like that; better keep these dumb feelings locked up and wait until they went away, which _surely_ they would at some point.

Trying to ignore the tiny voice in the back of his mind suggesting that he was wrong about the fleeting nature of his affections, Hajime sat up and looked at his clock: it was almost five in the afternoon. _Great_ , so apparently Oikawa wasn’t satisfied with just invading his every waking thought, he had to infiltrate his dreams and mess with his sleep cycle too. This crush was getting out of hand already and he had not idea what to do to rein it in. Maybe a walk would clear his mind.

With that in mind, Hajime got out of bed and rushed down the stairs. After a quick detour to the kitchen to fetch a banana and a cereal bar, he put on the first pair of trainers he could find, not even bothering to change out of the old Godzilla shirt and sweatpants combo that made up his pyjamas. Making sure to grab his earphones on the way out, he locked the door and set out on a light jog around the neighbourhood.

The exercise had helped him clear his head of any and all intrusive thoughts of cute boys, his mind in tune with the rhythm of his footsteps against the pavement and the song he was listening to. However, after about thirty minutes and taking a left in an intersection, his feet had brought him to the neighbourhood park and none other than Oikawa was sitting at the top of the old slide, setting a ball up and down repeatedly. Before he could even think about turning back and, who knows, maybe hide behind some bushes, Oikawa spotted him and waved.

“Iwa-chan!~” he said in that goddamned lilting voice of his, and so sweetly that even that annoying nickname sounded pleasing to the ears.

Oikawa had started calling him that on the first day of middle school because according to him, “ _You’re not the sweet child I befriended all those years ago anymore, so it would be rude to trick people into thinking that only to find out the sweet_ ‘Hajime-chan’ _is actually a brute. But I can’t call you_ ‘Iwaizumi-kun’ _like everyone else, it’s so impersonal! So Iwa-chan it is then!”_

Hajime had attempted to stop Oikawa from calling him that by using every technique he knew — from tickling him until he was almost peeing himself to refusing to play volleyball with him —, but he’d remained adamant and eventually Hajime had grudgingly accepted it. The worst part was that it didn’t even bother him anymore, and if he was being honest with himself he kind of liked having a nickname that only Oikawa called him by — not that he’d ever tell him that.

Seeing no way to escape Oikawa’s attention now, Hajime made his way over and sat on the grass next to the slide. Oikawa slithered down and reclined his body against it before turning his head to look at him. Whatever he saw made him widen his eyes, and Hajime cursed himself internally for not looking at a mirror before stepping out of the house.

“Wow Iwa-chan, you look like shit,” he said, a crease forming between his eyebrows.

“Thanks, you’re the third person to tell me that today,” he grumbled, turning his head to the side and avoiding Oikawa’s gaze.

“Did something happen? You look like you haven’t slept at all. Do you want to talk about it?” he asked, sounding concerned. Why was Oikawa worrying about him when _he_ had been the one acting strange for the past few weeks?

“Yeah, like you wanted to talk about why you’ve been weird around me,” Hajime said before he could stop himself. He probably should’ve kept quiet and waited until Oikawa decided to talk to him about it, but at this point it was just eating away at him and he _needed to know_. He didn’t want his friend to deal with whatever was going on inside his head alone; he wanted to be there for him, but he couldn’t do that if Oikawa didn’t let him in.

It was silent for a long moment, and when Hajime gathered enough courage to assess the situation he saw that Oikawa was wearing a slightly shocked expression and a blush was starting to spread over his cheeks and down his neck. _Cute_ , Hajime thought before he could stop himself, and had to fight down his own blush.

Trying to keep his composure, he cleared his throat and said, “Sorry, it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it. Forget I said anything.” And he meant it; he didn’t want to make Oikawa feel uncomfortable no matter how much his behaviour had bothered him.

That seemed to make Oikawa snap out of whatever daze he’d been in, and he scrambled to sit upright. “No, it’s not that! It’s just—,” he cut himself off mid-sentence and looked down before continuing in a quiet voice. “I’m sorry I was acting weird around you, Iwa-chan. I was thinking about stuff and trying to figure something out and ended up getting too caught up in my own head.”

Oikawa looked somewhat nervous and his answer was evasive, which made it clear he wanted to change topics. Whatever it was he’d been thinking so hard about seemed to be something he was convinced he had to deal with by himself, but that didn’t mean Hajime wouldn’t be there by his side if he needed him, so he made sure to say it out loud.

“Yeah well, if you ever want to talk about it you know I’m always here. And I know it’s easy for you to get too caught up in your own head like the dumbass you are, but if you need something to distract you from your thoughts, you know where to find me. We can always play video games or watch some of those shitty sci-fi movies you like so much.”

He tried to say this in his steadiest voice and to look at Oikawa in the eye so he knew how serious he was, and maybe Hajime was going insane but Oikawa’s answering smile seemed almost shy, _and was he blushing again_?

“Thank you, Iwa-chan. That means a lot to me.”

Oikawa’s answer was so open and raw, and said so sincerely that Hajime had no idea how to answer it, so he just looked to the side to hide his own blush and muttered a half-hearted “don’t mention it, dumbass”.

The giggle he got in return was so light and airy that for a moment he allowed himself to stop worrying about odd behaviours and complicated feelings and just let himself _feel_. Hajime really didn’t want to get his hopes up, but then Oikawa smiled at him — showing those cursed dimples — and ruffled his hair before getting up. Seeing him running to put some distance between them, holding the volleyball and calling out for him to get ready for his toss, brought back a sense of normalcy to his life and made him believe for a moment that things would be alright.

 

 

**iii. 18 years old**

 

Feeling something wet and slimy pooling on his chest was definitely one of the worst ways to be woken, and Hajime had already started recoiling back when his hand brushed against smooth skin. Feeling disoriented, he blinked his eyes open and stared at the faded glow-in-the-dark stars glued to his ceiling, trying to make sense of all the stimuli his senses were receiving.

The weak sunlight streamed through a gap in the curtains and cast a warm glow over the room, making everything look softer around the edges. He could hear a light snoring sound to his right and felt an oddly comforting weight pressed against his side. He allowed himself to bask in the soothing atmosphere for a moment before turning his head to inspect his surroundings, and immediately felt a smile tugging at his lips.

He could only just make out the top of Oikawa’s head from this position, his hair a wild mess and face squished against Hajime’s shoulder and collarbone. The rest of his body was completely covered by an old navy comforter, one of the many possessions he’d brought years ago to leave at Hajime’s house for their regular sleepovers. The constellation patterns drawn on it were fading and it was mostly threadbare by now, but Oikawa still refused to throw it away because _“it’s full of the memories of our youth, Iwa-chan! It’s the only reminder of times that we’ll never get back!”_

Hajime had always liked to tease him for being too sentimental but he couldn’t deny that seeing Oikawa now, buried in that fluffy comforter and sleeping in his childhood bedroom on the day after their high school graduation, was making him nostalgic. He let his mind wander to old memories of sleepovers on the weekends and sneaking a book and a flashlight under the covers to read scary stories way past their bedtime, and only realised he’d started carding his fingers through Oikawa’s hair when he stirred and yawned against his neck.

“Were you watching me sleep, Iwa-chan?” he mumbled sleepily and scooted up so his face was level with Hajime’s. The comforter slid down a bit and revealed a few purple marks at the base of his neck and around his right shoulder. Hajime would have to be more careful next time.

“Yeah, I was shocked at how ugly someone so pretty can look while unconscious,” he teased, but was surprised at how fond his voice sounded to his own ears.

Oikawa simply smiled and cooed, “Oooh, so Iwa-chan thinks I’m pretty!”

“Shut up, Trashykawa.” He tried to contain the smile that was threatening to break out on his face, but by the happy look Oikawa was giving him he could see it was a futile attempt. _Whatever_ , the thought; it wasn’t like Oikawa didn’t know he was absolutely smitten with him.

Leaning forward a bit, he placed a soft peck on the tip of Oikawa’s nose and let his hand caress down his side. “We should probably get up.”

“Mhm. Just five more minutes,” Oikawa answered, eyes already closing again and body relaxing against his touch. Hajime pinched his side and chuckled when he squawked and tried to slap his hand away.

“I’m serious, dumbass. We have to get ready for that celebration breakfast thing our moms booked, remember? I will _not_ be late and end up being subjected to their ire just because you wanted to sleep in. C’mon, let’s get up,” he said, rolling over Oikawa to reach the other side of the bed and squashing him in the process.

“Okay okay, I get it! Get _off me_ , you big oaf!” Oikawa whined and scrambled to his feet, getting his legs caught up in the comforter and almost falling on his face. Hajime couldn’t contain his laughter and ran towards the bathroom when Oikawa lunged at him.

After half an hour, a tickle fight, and two makeout sessions, they finally managed to shower and get dressed — Oikawa had two drawers reserved for his clothes in Hajime’s wardrobe — before heading downstairs, where their families were already waiting for them. Both of their mothers were sitting on the couch chatting with each other while Hajime’s father watched the morning news with Takeru snoozing on his lap.

They walked into the living room just as Oikawa’s father and his sister Eri came in through the front door carrying two heavy-looking boxes and setting them down by the far wall.

“Good morning, lovebirds. You took so long I thought I’d have to go to your room and drag you down myself. God knows catching you guys in the act once was enough,” Eri said while faking a shudder, but there was a playful smirk on her face. Their parents immediately burst into laughter, with no regards for privacy or common decency.

Hajime tried and failed to hide the blush that always accompanied that particular memory; he swore Eri-nee’s favourite pastime was to bring up their disgrace when they were most vulnerable so she could watch them squirm. For his part, Oikawa looked like he wanted a lightning to strike him dead right there in the middle of the living room.

“Oh my god nee-chan, you _promised_ to never bring this up again!” he whined, hiding his face between his hands. Hajime thought he’d never quite recovered from the embarrassment of that day; he understood entirely.

Oikawa’s father pretended to wipe away a tear and said, “Well, at least you both learnt an invaluable lesson that day: always lock the door.” The laughter only got louder at that, to the point where Takeru stirred from his nap.

“Alright guys, we should probably get going. We don’t want to miss our reservation, and I’m starving,” Hajime’s father said as he got up from the couch, holding Takeru against his chest.

They filed out of the house and walked towards the garage, with Hajime and Oikawa going in the Iwaizumis’ car while the Oikawas’ went in their own. Once they were settled in the backseat Oikawa laced their fingers together and began talking animatedly with his parents about his plans for the rest of the vacation. Hajime was content to just rest his head on Oikawa’s shoulder and watch the scenery pass by the windshield, mind wandering from one thought to the next.

Sometimes he still couldn’t believe his luck; if somebody had told his middle school self that one day he’d be dating his best friend and that their families would be supportive he’d have laughed in their faces. But somehow that’s what ended up happening, and he had mostly Oikawa to thank for it, if he was being honest.

Oikawa had confessed to him suddenly and very quietly during a sleepover in the summer of their second year of high school. He’d looked small and mildly frightened and nothing like himself, and Hajime remembers the surge of affection he felt at that moment distinctly, so powerful that couldn’t do anything but hug Oikawa tightly. He’d eventually calmed down and they talked and laughed about how stupid they’d both been.

They’d decided to tell their families separately, but had gotten similar responses: basically, it was a variation of how they’d seen it coming for probably longer than Hajime and Oikawa had even liked each other, and so _“had had quite some time to get get used to it, honestly”_ (as his father had put it). It had apparently become obvious to them by the _“lovelorn looks you both kept throwing each other’s way”_ (according to Eri-nee) and by _“the way Tooru-nii kept hanging off Hajime-nii all the time”_ (Takeru’s words). So all in all, one thing became very clear: they were dumbasses.

When Hajime turned his attention back to the present he immediately noted the subtle change in Oikawa’s demeanor and what the current topic of conversation was: university. His parents were asking him all sorts of questions about his plans for when university started, and although his excitement while answering them was genuine, Hajime could feel the slight tension in his shoulders from where he was resting his head and how the grip around his fingers had become stronger.

Talking about university plans had been hard for them at first because their top choices didn’t align and both felt like they hadn’t spent nearly enough time together before having to separate for so long. However, they also knew that this wasn’t a subject they could afford to brush off; that’s not how their relationship worked and if they wanted this to work out they had to do it together, as a team. So they’d talked and made plans and tried to meet each other in the middle. It hadn’t been easy to deal with, and sometimes Hajime still felt plagued by anxiety and doubt, but he believed that as long as they communicated and were honest with each other it would be fine.

Hajime felt the car slow down before coming to a stop in front of a quaint yet elegant restaurant, and his parents got out to sort out their reservations while they waited for Oikawa’s family to arrive.

He took the opportunity presented to him and squeezed Oikawa’s fingers lightly while turning to look him in the eyes; he needed to reassure the both of them that this would work, because he couldn’t do it by himself. And really, there was no point if Oikawa didn’t believe it too.

“Hey, don’t make that face. You know we’re going to be fine, right?” he said, surprising himself by the softness in his voice.

Oikawa seemed momentarily surprised by his sudden seriousness before recovering and smiling shyly, showing those dimples he loved so much. “You always sound like you can read my mind, Iwa-chan. How do you do it?”

“Too much time hanging out with you, I suppose.”

“I can’t help it that I’m so interesting,” he said in a tone he knew would annoy Hajime, laughing when he let go of his hand to flick him lightly on the nose. They wrestled half-heartedly for a moment before Oikawa intertwined their fingers together again and rested his other hand against Hajime’s cheek. “But seriously: I know we’re going to be fine. I’m going to make sure of it,” he said in his steadiest voice.

“ _We_ will make sure of it, together. Like we always do.”

As Oikawa let his eyes flutter shut and leaned in to kiss him, Hajime felt like they could truly make good on this promise.

 

 

**iv. 22 years old**

 

 _Long-distance relationships are hard_ , Hajime thought as he tried and failed to find his wallet inside the mess that was his suitcase.

He had no idea why he was having an existential crisis over something as trivial as being unable to find a specific personal object in a sea of _other personal objects_ , but he guessed there was something to do with the fact that he was still exhausted from the combined forces of hell week, yesterday’s train ride, and all the walking around he’d done after that. Just thinking about the fact he had to go back home on Sunday night made him want to lie in a fetal position and cry.

Honestly, damn him for choosing to go to university in Osaka while his boyfriend went to Tokyo, and damn the Japanese education system for designing a six-year medical school program. He couldn’t believe that just yesterday he’d been sitting at Oikawa’s graduation ceremony and on Monday he’d be back in his tiny apartment reviewing an inhuman amount of content to prepare for the rounds he’d start doing at the university hospital.

Why had he chosen this profession anyway? Something to do with helping people in need, he figured; it was honestly hard to remember when he could still feel the touch of Oikawa’s fingers against his skin, his mouth leaving a hot trail of kisses as he went down and—

Okay, no more of that: he had very good reasons to have chosen medicine, and he was good at it. He blamed his irrational thoughts on the fact he hadn’t seen Oikawa in two months and his brain was still processing the large amounts of endorphin, dopamine, and serotonin that had been released into his bloodstream the night before.

And it wasn’t as though they hadn’t kept in touch; on the contrary, they texted everyday, called at least twice a week, and Wednesday nights were Skype nights, so really Hajime had nothing to complain about. Except for the fact that he missed Oikawa like crazy even as he was talking to him on the phone, and his bed felt colder as soon as Oikawa left when it was his turn to visit, and he wanted to share every nice and weird and funny thing he saw with him and be able to see his reactions, and—

Wow, this was getting truly ridiculous. He was stronger than this. He could totally deal with being far from his boyfriend for another two years, after all he’d already had to withstand the separation for four years, so it wasn’t like he wasn’t used to it. He just had to remind himself Oikawa was only a train ride away. _A three-hour train ride away,_ and he’d have to go back home after only two days to only see each other again after two months because of the shinkansen ticket prices.

Hajime’s vision suddenly blurred and he felt even sorrier for himself. He was a 22 year old man on the verge of a breakdown over the fact he missed his boyfriend — who was in the next room waiting for him so they could go out to have dinner —, which had been triggered by the sight of a messy suitcase. And he still couldn’t find his damn wallet.

Just as he was considering the advantages of hiding under the comforter for the rest of the night Oikawa appeared in the doorway, coat hanging off of one arm.

“Haji, what are you taking so long for? I’m starving!” he whined and was already heading over to probably drape himself all over him, but stopped abruptly when he heard Hajime let out a sniff. _Goddamnit_. After his initial confusion, Oikawa hurried to his side and turned him around so they were facing each other. “Haji, are you _crying_? Is everything okay? What happened?”

He had a very worried look on his face that Hajime just wanted to clear away, but he’d become so overwhelmed with these feelings that all that came out of his mouth was, “I can’t find my wallet.”

“...what?” Oikawa looked appropriately confused, but after a moment — and before Hajime could feel like an even bigger dumbass — he got up and started searching around his bedroom. Not even two minutes later he turned back over with the offending object held in his hand.

He walked up to Hajime and took one of his hands before gently tugging him up and towards the bed to sit down. “There you go, we found your wallet. Now can you tell me why you were crying?” he said it so softly that Hajime felt like crying all over again.

“I guess I saw my suitcase there and it reminded me that I have to leave tomorrow and we won’t see each other again for a while,” he mumbled, trying to keep his voice from shaking.

Hajime had no idea how he expected Oikawa to answer that, but it certainly wasn’t by giggling like a schoolgirl. He honest to god _giggled_. Hajime had to admit he was very unimpressed and it must have shown on his face because Oikawa immediately cleared his throat before assuming a more serious demeanor.

“Oh, no no no. Sorry Haji, I wasn’t laughing at you, it’s just— Well, I gess I should’ve said something before,” he fretted over his words, but Hajime could still make out the beginnings of a smile on his face.

“What do you mean?” He had no idea what Oikawa was talking about or why he seemed so happy over his misery, but he guessed there must be a good reason, otherwise there’d be blood.

“I have a surprise for you. I was going to tell you this over dinner, but it’s clear now that you love me _so much_ you can’t wait that long.” Before Hajime could voice any of his _many_ opinions over that statement, Oikawa went on excitedly; at this point he was practically bouncing on the bed. “You see, a few scouts have been approaching me for a couple of months now.”

They had talked before about Oikawa’s plan to play volleyball professionally after graduation, and Hajime never had any doubts that he could do it. But he still didn’t know where this was going, so settled for answering with a neutral, “Okay, go on.”

That didn’t seem to discourage Oikawa at all, going by the growing smile on his face. “Anyway, so I had pretty much settled on staying in Tokyo, but a couple of weeks ago the Panasonic Panthers reached out to me and offered a really good deal, and seeing as they’re one of the best teams in the league it was a no-brainer to say yes. So I guess now I’m moving to Osaka.”

It took Hajime a long moment to comprehend Oikawa’s words, and when his mind finally caught up he felt like his chest had expanded three times its normal size. He wondered if one could die from happiness; it seemed very likely judging by how fast his heart had started beating. Trying not to let the emotions get the better of him, he managed to croak out a broken “...what?”

Oikawa smiled widely; it was his favourite one because it showed his cute dimples and made his eyes turn soft. He giggled again and intertwined their fingers together. “I’m moving to Osaka, and I was wondering if you wanted to live with me?”

The sheer affection with which Oikawa looked at him only intensified his own, and it swelled so fast that he couldn’t hold it in anymore. He wrapped his arms around Oikawa’s neck and pushed him down against the bed, burrowing his face against his hair and breathing in his scent; for his part Oikawa simply laughed and enveloped Hajime’s waist with his arms, saying, “I didn’t get an answer to my question, _Iwa-chan~_ ”

Oikawa still called him by that nickname occasionally, especially to tease him, but Hajime was so incredibly happy that he couldn’t even fake annoyance. He just lifted his head and pecked his boyfriend on the lips, smiling all the while and whispering, “Of course I want to, dumbass.”

 

 

**v. 24 years old**

 

Hajime was dreaming, happily burrowed in the cosiness of his blankets when the comforting weight pressed against his side suddenly disappeared, taking all the warmth with it and consequently rudely waking him up. He tried to chase it by stretching his arm out and reaching blindly, but then cold fingers wrapped around his wrist and he heard a hoarse chuckle.

“‘Morning. Gonna make breakfast, get up soon,” Oikawa’s sleepy voice said and then he felt cold all over again when he let go of his wrist.

He heard Oikawa moving around the bedroom before walking towards the living room. The sound of the kitchen radio reached his ears, followed by Oikawa humming along. He could clearly picture him swaying to the music while cutting some vegetables or waiting for the rice to cook, and the image made him smile.

Deciding it was futile to go back to sleep he got up and sluggishly made his way to the bathroom to brush his teeth. His reflection in the mirror looked as tired as he felt. Yesterday had been his graduation ceremony, and both his and Oikawa’s parents had come to visit, which meant that after sitting down and being bored for hours he’d had to walk around town with their families to grab some lunch and visit some tourist spots. It had been a nice day, but right now his feet and back were hurting like crazy. And obviously after going back home Oikawa had talked him into watching a marathon of old X-Files episodes on TV, so they had gone to sleep rather late.

On the bright side it was finally the weekend, so Hajime could laze around the apartment and indulge himself by napping and cuddling on the couch with his boyfriend, with nothing to worry about but whether they’d stay in or go out for lunch. Honestly, that sounded ideal.

Once he stepped out of the bedroom he was hit by a delicious smell and his stomach started growling. Hajime wasn’t too shabby in the kitchen, having learnt more than enough to feed himself well when he lived alone, but there was nothing quite like Oikawa’s cooking and he’d been very thankful when they’d finally moved in together and he could experience it on a regular basis.

Following the scent to the kitchen, Hajime stopped at the doorway and observed the charming spectacle in front of him. Oikawa was standing in front of the stove dressed in a pair of boxers and what looked like one of Hajime's old Godzilla shirts, with a light blue apron covering it all. The sunlight filtering through the blinds painted the kitchen in alternating strips of soft shadows and golden hues, making his skin feel like it was glowing and that his legs went on for miles. He was nodding his head along to the beat of some 90’s hit and his messy hair bounced slightly with the movement.

The scene was so domestic that Hajime felt a warmth filling his chest as he walked over to Oikawa, wrapping his arms around his waist and resting his head against his shoulder blade. Oikawa hummed and turned his head to the side, leaning down slightly to place a kiss on his forehead.

“Good morning, love. There’s coffee on the counter and I’m just finishing up breakfast,” he murmured against his skin, causing Hajime to shiver slightly.

“Okay, I’ll go set up the table,” he said but made no move to leave. Oikawa’s shoulder was just too comfortable.

Oikawa chuckled and lightly elbowed him in the ribs. “I can’t believe I’m the one doing everything in this house. What am I, a househusband?”

Hajime smirked and moved back on the pretense of grabbing the bowls and chopsticks from the cabinets. Once he was far away enough he said, “I’m the overworked doctor who pays the bills and you’re the trophy sexy athlete husband that I get to come home to.”

The response was immediate: Oikawa fake-gasped like the dramatic little shit he was and put his hand on his chest. “So _that’s_ the real reason you’re with me, Dr. Iwaizumi. I knew you were only using me for my body.” He pretended to wipe a tear away and Hajime had to try very hard to hold back his laughter.

“Your body _and_ your cooking skills. Let’s see how good this breakfast even is,” he said as he set up the table and sat down on one of the chairs.

Oikawa turned around and approached him with a glint in his eyes that spelled trouble. He leaned over to deposit food in the bowls and whispered in Hajime’s ear, “Would you care for some bacon and eggs, Dr. Iwaizumi? They’re my specialty.” Before Hajime could even react he slid on the seat across from him and waggled his eyebrows, a nasty smirk on his face.

Hajime couldn’t hold back his laughter then. That was probably the dumbest thing he’d ever heard in his life, and he loved Oikawa so much for it.

He took a few deep breaths to recover and wiped actual tears from his eyes. “You’re such a dumbass, I swear it must be a gift.”

“That might be so, but you _love_ me,” Oikawa winked and made obnoxious kissing noises to try and make him laugh again.

Hajime couldn’t even find it in himself to deny it because anything he said would’ve been a lie. He was just content to bask in the warmth of the morning sun and enjoy his boyfriend’s great cooking while he made silly jokes, so he only answered with a soft “That I do.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the r/haikyuu Discord's April Prompt - "The first day after graduation."
> 
> Huge thanks to the lovely [weirdmilk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/weirdmilk/pseuds/weirdmilk/) for proofreading this fic and enabling my constant screaming about iwaoi. Love you <3
> 
> Kudos and comments are my life source (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧
> 
> I made a moodboard for this fic, which you can check out [here](https://loveintheveins.tumblr.com/post/173494504354/of-transition-and-permanence-pairing-iwaizumi/). You can also find me on [tumblr](https://loveintheveins.tumblr.com/).


End file.
